Can we talk about this girl for a minute?
Like even as I'm writing this my eyes are filled with tears reflecting on what has now been our life these last almost six weeks. Four and a half years ago her eyes met mine in a conference room here's-your-new-baby-meet-the-birth-mom-sign-these-papers-good-luck-new-parents-goodbye exchange and we began this insanely delicate life long relationship of mother and daughter. She was the easiest baby to get to smile. She was beautiful, to the point that in any given shopping trip or outing I would have no less than five people on average stop and tell me how beautiful she was. Being that I'm average looking at best I began to wonder how I would parent someone whose looks on the outside didn't dictate their worth entirely. Tyler and I joked frequently about how we would parent a "pretty" child! We began sprinkling in more "you're so smart"s and "you're so kind"s and commented on those things that internally make her the most beautiful little girl. With parenting so much is done with this kind of thing in the beginning years with almost little to no visual pay off to even know if its working...until the day you bring four kids into HER house, to use HER toys, to need HER parents, and who aren't necessarily as receptive to "us" being family to them yet. From the beginning of this year long process I prayed specifically that she would be accepted into their already existing family and vice versa, that she would accept them into ours. She called them her brothers and sisters right away and drew pictures of us all together before they even came home to us. At night time when we would say prayers she would almost never forget to pray for them and a few times a week ask when they would come home to us BUT when it came time to put actual actions with those words? She freaking delivered. And I wasn't surprised at all. My girl, she's clutch like that. Like a kind gracious ninja using hugs and laughter as her weapons, she is the very essence of believing the best about someone and I seriously am so proud of her. Has it been all fun and games completely void of meltdowns or new behavior? Of course not, she's only human. Has it been filled with moments where she fights for what's right, thanks God for them during her dinner prayers and looks like a giddy little school girl when she's going to bed with her sisters? Yes. And those moments? They are so worth it. They are reassurance to us that being gracious and kind are more long lasting than being beautiful and we have a front row seat and are her biggest fans. To my first girl and the gracious one, when I get to wake up and see your face in the morning I count myself as the luckiest mama in the world. When I hear your laugh, hug your neck and kiss your cheeks I never want to stop. Thank you for being to me what I never knew I needed.