Monday, March 19, 2012

The year of "No's"...

One year ago the church plant that we helped start shut down. There are some days where it feels like FOREVER, but most times it has flown by for me. Tyler on the other hand probably doesn't share that same view...you see my husband lived and breathed for planting a church. He studied, he gave his time above and beyond what was expected, he believed in what he helped to start and he believed he would be in ministry long term. I believed it for us as well. I've never seen him so passionate about his PURPOSE before and it did my heart good every single day to see him using his talents and be fulfilled in his job. For the last year we have said goodbye to family and friends, relocated to another state and are living with Tyler's parents, suffered through months of job searching, and endured "no" after "no" after "no" after "no" when it came to worship leader positions for Tyler. I'll touch briefly on this because it absolutely needs to be said. Just because you're applying for a job at a church doesn't mean they're always going to respond professionally or even respond at all. This has been such a weird phenomenon to me and in my opinion when you're representing Christ's name as a business you should act professionally and above and beyond any other business out there. If this is making you uncomfortable, I do not apologize. *Stepping off of my very much downplayed (because Tyler would kill me if I said more) soap box*.
Do you want to know the hardest part about this? The silence. The weird "almost" opportunities that creep up and are gone before we could even give them a second thought. I'm not complaining, honestly. I'm, ahem WE are just confused and searching. There are moments of clarity that are like striking gold. We have both been able to identify necessary changes in ourselves and also new desires that we had no idea even existed. We both want to make a difference. We both want to give back and we sometimes know what that looks like and other times we don't. We both feel like it's time to take a risk. A real, unadulterated risk that leaves us terrified out of our minds and more than likely other people scratching their heads. One of the things we struggle with is being wise and responsible while taking a risk. It's a delicate balance and I don't know that anyone has ever perfected it. There is movement on one particular opportunity that we're pretty pumped about...alas, it's back to the waiting.
Here is what I know. The three of us are in it to win it. We're tough and we're not giving up. We pray constantly for God's direction in our lives and for a new path and would plead with you to do the same for us.

2 comments:

  1. Praying for you guys--for clear direction and for peace in the waiting.

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  2. I love this post! You are amazing & although it seems like alot of "no" God is totally working out all the tiny details & behind the scenes to bring your desires & His ultimately perfect will together!!! Love that you are in it to win it & that you know he is faithful!

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