I assume when you have a bio child discovering similarities between yourself and said child are super cool! Actually being able to "see" the resemblance and know that your DNA is woven into this human being is something I'm certain is amazing. So in these times where I'm grasping at the reality that things may be difficult when my little lovey is struggling with the fact that she doesn't look like us, I'll remind her often of the days where I discovered plenty about the three of us that make us fit perfectly together.
Monday, May 16, 2011
It never occurred to me how much I would care that Emery and I have similarities. I mean we're all born different, with different skill sets and looks but when we adopted I found myself hanging on to the little bits of similarities I have with my little love like little pieces of treasure that I dare not share with anyone. It's a fact, she doesn't share my genes. It's not an overreaction or a way to feel sorry for myself...it is what it is. I'll never look at her and think...hmmmm she definitely has my eyes, or my hair (that would look interesting on my head for sure!). So in the last couple months as her personality changes and morphs into more of a little person I find myself delightfully surprised at our similarities. Starting with the fact that homegirl LOVES to sleep! When it's time for her nap and I walk into her room, she gets all giddy...legs kicking and giggly when she sees her blankets in her crib. It may come as a surprise to only a select few of you but I LOVE sleep. I love going to bed at night, I love naps (my favorite are the ones where you open the windows on a crisp day and crawl under the down comforter), I love sleep. Second, she's a pretty wild sleeper and sleeps on her belly with her bum straight up in the air. I don't do the bum in the air part but I'm a wild sleeper and sleeping on my tummy wreaks havoc on my spine but I don't give a rats pooper and I do it anyway. Next, she's stubborn and independent. This one isn't my favorite because I'M stubborn and independent which makes teaching my stubborn and independent almost one year old nearly impossible because we BOTH want to do it OUR way. Last, and this is my favorite, we both can't get enough of Tyler. Seriously. She loves her daddy...she cuddles with him way more than with me, and I think gets a little more excitable when he's around. Lets face it...I can't live without him either. He's an amazing husband and best friend...a fearless leader of his girls and has integrity for miles.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
This Mother's Day was packed full of many different emotions. We're moving. Out of state back to the grand old land of corn, cows and mosquitoes...Indiana. Now lets get one thing straight...I hate Florida. I know that might sound really strange since people tend to vacation here but I seriously loathe this state...the weather (except for like January-March) is not my style, the scenery really isn't that fantastic, I miss the seasons. I miss the leaves changing, snow, ice, scraping, salting, snot freezing cold. There's one thing though that makes Florida worth it. My family...we're big, we're dysfunctional, disorganized, but we laugh and joke and usually spend our Sunday evenings together. So this Mother's Day I was thinking about how I probably won't be with my own mama next year, I was thinking how much I'll miss her random phone calls and birthday dinners. I was thinking about how much I love her, and the sacrifices she made for all of us kids growing up. I was thinking about all her good qualities and how much I want to soak all of those in and pass them along to my little bug. I was also contemplating how strange it is to be a mom, to have this day mean something totally different for me than my last 28 years. I know eventually this day will hold more weight, more tradition and such. So for now, I just enjoyed my little girl who was completely out of character that morning and a pinch on the cuddly side! I also found myself thinking of FM...obviously this day is probably not celebratory for her by any stretch of the imagination. I mean technically she is a mother, but she doesn't have a child to show for it. Once again I'm brought to my knees in prayer for her and the heartbreak she must be facing during these special "first holiday's". She gave me the greatest gift ever, selflessness in the form of my girl. Happy Mother's Day FM... hang tight one day you'll be able to celebrate this day with a child in your arms.
Monday, May 2, 2011
We have some pretty major things happening in our lives right now and some transitions that have been harder to deal but in the midst of it all I have one little girl that makes this life just a little bit sweeter. Here are some things that she is doing lately...
*She's full blown mobile now. Crawling everywhere and finding every last ounce of dog hair possible so she can sample the grossness for herself.
*She's sassy and stubborn, and there are times where Tyler and I look at each other and go..."oh my gosh, how do you deal with this at almost 11 months old?". She yells at us when we take something away from her, glances knowingly in my direction when she's about to put something in her mouth she shouldn't and then smiles when I say, uh uh.
*She LOVES music. Loves it. Loves when we sing to her, sits quietly in the back seat when it's playing in the car, stares directly at the TV when it comes on. It's truly amazing, and I can't wait to see what her musical talent will be.
*She's eating people food now. Scrambled eggs, turkey, chicken, green beans etc. She refuses her baby food when people food is anywhere near.
*She's flexible with her schedule. We can take her anywhere at any time and she's usually down for whatever which is nice because most times we're fly by the seat of our pants kind of people.
So...in case you're wondering. She's magic. Her smile, her laugh, her smell, her hugs and kisses...pure unadulterated magic. Sometimes I think it's so strange that last year we didn't know her, or even the possibility of her. God is good.