Tuesday, March 9, 2010

First denial...

Last night I prayed with Tyler that God would prepare our hearts for the possibility that some, if not all, of our grants and loans wouldn't produce any financial aid in this process. I prayed that I would trust Him to know the correct path for us as we move forward. I asked Him to truly allow us to dive deep into His Word, and pray for trust in regards to funding this adoption. We said we would in the beginning and by golly we will do just that. I said in the last post that this month would be make or break it month for us. We will be hearing back from nearly every grant/loan we applied for by the end of the month. I thought to myself today...this time next month we will be on a different path with this adoption. We will either be happily on our way, thanking God for his monetary provisions that allow us to move forward with maybe baby in April/May...OR we will be scratching our heads for ideas on additional fundraising efforts. Either way, I know it's His plan, I just have to pray like a crazy person that I will be ok with it. This very afternoon, strangely enough on a Tuesday (everything monumental up until this point has seriously occurred on a Tuesday), we received an email from one place we applied to. It was a thanks and we're happy for you pursuing this adoption thing but we got nothin' for ya email. I've never received an email like that before this very day and I'd prefer not to receive one any time soon. SO, that's one down.
I'm a tough cookie, I'm a move forward don't sulk kinda gal, but deep down I'm just a future mama that wants to hold my little guy or gal sooner than later. I want to be inconvenienced by their crying and their pooping and peeing. I look at kids in the store or restaurants that are screaming their bloody brains out and I smile because I want that. Continue to pray that God's will be done for us in this process of funding our adoption. Tyler and I would greatly appreciate that!

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