Monday, October 12, 2009

Sometimes this doesn't seem real...

It’s times like these last couple weeks where I am able to go almost an entire day without thinking about adoption, that I forget this is real. I mean for anyone who has gone through the adoption process and even those women who are in their first trimester of pregnancy (and not experiencing morning sickness & their bellies aren’t growing yet), where you’re kinda like “OH YEAH, that’s right…I’m going to be a mom”. We’ve just been gathering little bits and pieces of paperwork the last couple weeks, getting our first round of fingerprinting done, waiting really to hear what else we need to be working on. There’s so much paperwork but there’s piles that can’t be done until our home study is completed, and other piles that I’m procrastinating because they aren’t as fun to work on. One thing I’ve done to help me stay in the adoption state of mind is watch adoption videos on youtube and read tons of adoption blogs too. I am an information junkie…anytime I get a new electronic, dog, or hobby I read a TON of stuff on it. I read the manual, I research the breed, I buy a book on it. You can’t do this with your individual child but you can do it with the processes of child rearing…I mean the basic things like how to change a diaper, to what to expect developmentally. I know this kind of information won’t help me a hundred percent of the time but at least I’ll be able to refer to my internal manual on certain things. Those videos and blogs will help me pack the right stuff, bring the right medications, help me understand the process once we get there, give me good restaurants to eat at, or the right airline to fly. I’ll be able to learn about Ethiopia, the people, the country, the languages, and the need. I still continue to have my days of I can’t believe I’m going to be a mom. When those freaky thoughts overcome me I immediately think of some positives. Oh right, and to let you know as a side note, I have to do this for my own well being because we’ll be married for 8 years when this little treasure makes it way home, 8 years folks. Some of you may not know but I come from a very large family, I am the second of seven children which means my baby experiences are a lot, I always babysat, I’ve worked at a preschool and also have been a nanny so overall I’m very comfortable with the know how but none of those experiences weren’t ever overnight for the rest of my life experiences. I’m anticipating that within the first day of being a mom I’ll have utilized all that I remember and just be a complete mess. I keep thinking we don’t even know how to deal with a baby together let alone travel across the entire country and bring one back. Talk about adjustment, I’d like to connect with a first time parent who became a first time parent through adoption. Back to the positives…

1. I can’t wait to be able to soothe a child in my own way, you know have them want ME to comfort them the way I still to this day want my own mother to comfort me.

2. I can’t wait to see Tyler as a dad. He is an amazing human, and will be an amazing dad with great insight and silliness, and I’m sure will immediately teach his child guitar, to hate all green vegetables, and that the steelers are the best team in all of the land.

3. The laundry….even the laundry is cuter. The little socks and shirts!

4. I can’t wait for funny stories! I get to read so many facebook status updates, or other people’s blogs where their kids say the most hilarious things ever!

I’ll save the rest for another freak out day.

Proverbs 2:6 ”Only the Lord gives wisdom; He gives knowledge and understanding”. Amen to that.

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